The List

Did you see mean girls? This is worse. The information divulged in the post is top fucking secret. I could die, or at the very least get sat upon for telling it. Bu I will…for my fans I will do this.

This is a list of people I work with. This is what we call them. This is why we call them these names. Yes, I am aware of my impending trip to hell.

Puffy Stink Hole**

She gets this name because her face is puffy and pink and she makes terrible sinky poops with no shame at all. All the time, just pooping. Which makes up think this is why her face is always pink and puffy.

Flake-o**

Where to start. Nice lady, roughly 400 pounds poured into screaming strech pants 5 sizes to small. with crocs and no socks. She has a skin condition similar to a snake shedding it skin. She claims it makes her smell. I say her two foot long ass crack never been washed might be the cause of the odor. She has giant hot cake shaped boobs that have never seen a bra. And the biggist piece of evidence I have against her is that she does not wipe. Maybe she cant reach. maybe the maisture helps the skin problem. I know this forfact. I bore witness to the “no wipe”

Chicken hawk**

Also, nice girl. likes perms and highlights. is about 4 feet two hundred pounds. wears ponchos. for reasons never made clear, has a hair cut that looks alot like a roosters head. kind of a mohawk/mullet if you will.

Wet Rot**

Seems to have decaying flesh in her mouth. all her teeth look like one tooth fused. The smell is not good. if wet rot and flake o joined forces they would be a mighty threat. they might even beat terrorism

The Expert**

She is a a know it some, bt she believes she knows it all.

new jen will have to talk on this later

The Captian**

She is scarey and abrubt. Unless I can do a in person impersonation of her, there is really no use in explaining her behavior other than to say she is unpredictible, and one day Jen called her a “fun sucker” which has remained a highlight for me. They moved our seats soon after

Googly eye**

another boss…both eyes going in different directions. And her teeth are stacked like stairs. She is difficult to look at. I hide from her alot.

Googly Jr**

Similar eye problems. She likes to spy on people too. She is generally considered wierd and I avoid her. She gets perms too.

Slick**

She is most hated. And I have never seen fresh washed hair get a grease slick on it the way hers does. I often dream of punching her in the throat.

Cannon ball**

This is a case of tropic thunder. Big girl gone bad. She is pretty much 4 x4 and looks like a cannon ball. One day she wore this red dress with fringe, looked like the cool ade dude, so now when I see her I do a silent “ohhh yeahhh”

55**

He is 55 and looks like the dood from “candy man” and the green mile. he frightens me.

polly pocket**

Self explanatory..she is wee tiny

Hershey Kiss**

this has to do with shape…picture the candy and this is who that girl measures up. but she isnt sweet. she also has crunchy hair

Flash Dance**

Lots of leggins and sweater dresses. Wild hair too. Good friends with cannon ball.

Gigantor**

this chick is like seven feet tall. If im next to her I hit her tummy area.

Captian caveman teeth**

her teeth are triangular and huge.and yellow. and she never washes her hands in the restroom. the expoert calls her stink finger

Camel Toe**

I cant say much about this except that Jen and I often discuss how horrible it must be to strangle your vagina every day the way she does. she must have a callus or something…its like a 3 inch toe.

Squirrley**

i cant saymuch here. Just wierd wierd pretty girl. but wierd. always keyed up.

Beef Jerky**

too much tanning bed

Orphin annie**

all grown up. huge. its a hard knock life…

Munchichi**

Seriously…no joke…looks just like one.

Big K**

She missed her calling at being a truck driver dispatcher…She is loud and raspy all the day long. right at the back of my head.

Sir Lance Alot**

Lots of silky flowy shirts. bad rotton teeth. Incredibly stupid

Dog Weiner Whisperer**

He is loud. He talks about inappropriate stuff, like weiner gods dragging their erect junk on the carpet.

jen also called him two toned tony and for several months i beleived his name was tony. it isnt.

Workout**

see the show, then youll know. Jen will explain

Miani Vice**

I knew him before in his days of hawian shirts. he takes 7 foot strides with a limp. Jen said its like being chased by a one legged pirate in a hurry.

Tank**

Another big girl. she cries alot. and loosley resembles a tank

That is the list. I hope Jen hops on here to clarify some of this.

I hope you enjoy. I enjoy it everyday.